It’s like saying,
‘I would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station...’”
There's always a point when im traveling when i feel like i've moved just a bit too far, and should have stayed longer in the previous place.
When i was alone in Romania last fall, i just wanted to be back in Turkey...and now, on this adventure, now that i am alone in Turkey, wandering around by myself... i just wish i was in Syria.
Nobody speaks any english in Turkey. i forgot that. and id actually gotten used to Arabic, to hellos and goodbyes and thankyous and how much, (to Salaams and Masalaama and Shukrans and Bikams , that is)...and now its all this crazy long turkish words that i can technically read but make no sense, and NOBODY else is here in Urfa..and it is truly the middle of nowhere, Turkey, which is cool...but it would be cooler if i met another traveler to eat with, drink tea with, hang out with etc.
All ive ate since getting here is shwarma and some peaches off the street, because i hate being alone in restaurants and having the constant attention of greasy men. ugh.
i also feel slightly homesick, and like...what am i even DOING here. honestly. what the hell. WHAT is the situation here? i mean, i know if i was back in Calgary i would kill to be here, doing nothing, in the sacred religious town of Urfa, but now that i am here, i just feel like i ought to be back where i was....bahhhh.
and im a bit nervous about Iraq. i know the areas im going to are safe, but...i just wish i had someone coming with me. I am much braver with someone next to me, even if its me doing the talking.
well...goodnight (which i dont even remember how to say in turkish. dammit)